The Battle of Five Armies teaser!

  • *hears noises at night*: well this is it this is the end for me I had a good life
  • *gets shampoo in my eyes*: I guess I'm blind now how am I ever going to see my first born child
  • *heart is beating fast*: I think I am having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is
  • *a cop walks by*: here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone
  • *taking a test*: don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school and amount to nothing
  • *gets a sunburn*: great now I have skin cancer how will I tell my parents
  • *tripping over something*: I guess my leg will have to be amputated why did this happen to me
  • *period is late*: shit i'm pregnant i'm the next virgin mary
“I think I’ll probably retire now. It’s the only way. Get a dirt bike, some sheep to round up… Nah, maybe not. It’s time for a holiday. Ten days off, chill out, see some friends who are over in Europe on holiday. But first I’m going to celebrate for a couple of days. I’ve told my engineers and trainer to cancel their flights. The plan is to wake up with a hangover. I’ve been lucky to win two races in really good party towns and I intend to enjoy it.”
- Daniel Ricciardo (on what’s coming next for him)

(Fuente: redbull.com)

F1 2014

  • Mercs: bye peasants
  • Red bull: taking my time here just making some tea in this straight line
  • Ferrari: alon5so and Kimi but maybe bianchi
  • Mclaren: waiting for Honda
  • Williams: smedley is MINE
  • Force india: forever making one less stop
  • Toro rosso: fire! fire! fire every race!!!
  • Lotus: forever fixing pastor's car
  • Marussia: points bitches pointS
  • Caterham: no one even knows who bought us

Reference post (mostly for me!) about f1 tyres.
Red Supersoft. The softest compound in the range is ideal for slow and twisty circuits, especially in cold weather, when maximum mechanical grip is needed. The supersoft benefits from an extremely rapid warm-up time, which makes it ideal in qualifying as well, but the flip side to that important characteristic is of course increased degradation. This is a low working range compound. One of the key evolutions this year has been optimisation of the footprint pressure and temperature distribution. This presents a more even contact with the asphalt, improving grip and handling.
Yellow Soft. This is one of the most frequently-used tyres in the range, striking a very good balance between performance and durability, with the accent on performance. It is still biased towards speed rather than long distances, but is nonetheless capable of providing teams with a competitive advantage both at the beginning of the race on full fuel and when used as a ‘sprint’ tyre at the end. This is a high working range compound.
White Medium. Theoretically this is the most perfectly balanced of all the tyres, with an ideal compromise between performance and durability. As a result, it is extremely versatile, but it often comes into its own on circuits that tend towards high speeds, temperatures, and energy loadings. This is a low working range compound.
Orange Hard. The toughest tyre in Pirelli’s range is designed for the circuits that put the highest energy loadings through the tyres, with fast corners or abrasive surfaces, and are often characterised by high ambient temperatures. The compound takes longer to warm up, but offers maximum durability – which frequently means that it plays a key role in race strategy. This is a high working range compound.
Green Intermediate. The intermediates are the most versatile of the rain tyres, dispersing approximately 25 litres of water per second at full speed. They can be used on a wet as well as a drying track. This is the only tyre that has not changed compared to last year.
Blue Wet. The full wet tyres can disperse up to 65 litres of water per second at full speed (increased from 60 litres last year), making them the most effective solution for heavy rain. The latest evolution of the Cinturato Blue means that it is also effective on a drying track, with increased durability. The full wet tyre has a new compound and a redesigned rear tread pattern to further reduce aquaplaning. The result of this intensive work is increased driveability in a wide variety of conditions.
(source: wikipedia & pirelli)

I still waiting for Lewis’s gifs, people. You know, the pizza ones. Waiting and waiting.